This rain makes me wet. What about you guys? The best thing about being wet is being inside where it’s dry and comfortable. Next to the Internet. Where you can hear John and me be completely retarded and disgusting on the radio. And where you can also hear hilarious celebrity and up-and-coming comedians cutting loose with no content restrictions. And lots of times they are drunk and say outlandish things that reveal their true outlandish natures. Let me tell you something. It makes great radio.

Phil Perrier is a hilarious national touring stand-up comedian and writer for the Jay Leno show as well as the George Lopez show. (Not to mention a regular on the John Miller Program with Susan Maletta!) He started with All Comedy Radio in the spring of 2003 and was syndicated on 37+ stations in the United States, 23+ stations in Canada, and one station in South Africa. He is best known for the Hollywood Report “Limited Access”, Recurring Sketches: “Interview with a Dead Guy”, “Celebrity Sodium Pentothal”, “Wisdom of the Ages, with Ceepak Okra”, and “Oblivious Witness to History”. In 1990, Phil started writing jokes for Jay Leno & “The Tonight Show” and still to this day writes for Jay.

Next up, making his debut to the show, and showcasing some cute-ass dimples. I mean, they’re not “ass dimples” really…I mean maybe he has ass dimples, who knows? But I’m sure I will ask him! Ben Kolina’s coming to the show!

Ben Kolina got his first experience drawing laughter from strangers in the right-field bleachers of the Oakland Coliseum, at the expense of visiting players. A proud resident of Livermore, California, Ben mounted an unsuccessful campaign for the mayor’s office at 18 years of age. (Yes. Ben “mounted”. Then was discounted.) Currently 28, a former musician, a former journalism student, and an experienced retail technician; Ben Kolina ate hallucinogenic mushrooms in the woods two summers ago, and decided to do stand-up comedy. Since then, Ben has performed in showcases at Tommy T’s and at San Francisco’s historic Purple Onion. You can see him this Tuesday, March, 29th at the San Francisco Punchline for Big Al’s Big Ass Comedy Show with headliner Casey Ley.

Next up, the wildly funny Mike Spiegelman is coming in. Mike Spiegelman hosts the weekly Layover Comedy Night in Downtown Oakland, cohosts Bad Movie Night at SF’s Darkroom Theater, and has opened for David Cross, Emo Phillips, Robin Williams, and the late Mitch Hedberg. He’s acted in the SF cult film, “The Snake.” His one-man show “Salad Jokes Live” is based on material from his humor website, By the way, it’s so funny when Mike hosts at the Layover. Comedians go over their time limit all the time there. Maybe cuz they’re drunk, who gives a shit. Anyway, so they ignore Mike’s light. So Mike goes and stands almost directly infront of the comedian and just glares at them until they walk off. It’s the funniest fuckin’ thing ever. So go and see that sometime.

And finally…

My funny friend, Melanie O’Brien, who once upon a fun-ass time verbally assaulted a certain Slutty McSlutpants with her razor-sharp wit, is gracing us with her domineering yet oh-so-endearing presence tonight! Melanie, I love you girl.

Melanie O’Brien burst onto the San Francisco comedy scene telling raunchy jokes at venues all over the Bay Area. I consider Melanie a kindred spirit to me in that dirty minds think alike! She’s performed at venues such as the Purple Onion, Harveys, and the Dark Room. Melanie also attends law school. People often ask her if she’s going to drop out of law school to pursue stand-up, but she likes to think that she can manage them both, as naive as that may be.

Tune in!

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